In the Book of Proverbs, we are warned over and over again about the lurking dangers of the “strange woman.” In the tragic experience of many married men, the strange woman has destroyed countless homes and marriages. Only by recognizing her wiles can a Godly man seek to guard his heart and protect his marriage. This topic is especially for the benefit of men who are married but who may be a target of a strange woman.

To many, the idea of a “strange woman” implies a woman who is lewd and openly sensual. But this is not always the case. A strange woman can be any woman who is not your wife! This conniving woman is never fully what she seems, and she can be very deceiving and alluring. Here are a few cautions that are important to know about this potential threat to your marriage and fidelity to your wife.

She may be a smooth talker

So often, messages exchanged to another of the opposite sex can lead to emotional attachments outside of one’s marriage. According to Proverbs 5:3, “the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil.” Her voice is sweet. She is alluring. She does not immediately make demands of any type. She is friendly and smiling. She leads a man to think of himself as appealing to her. With unrighteous ulterior motives, the strange woman possibly attracts a man through her initial actions or demeanor, deliberately expressing to him gratefulness or kindness. 

Her luring words and compliments are often a temptation to unsuspecting or unguarded men. As James reminded the early church, “When lust is conceived, it bringeth forth sin; and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death” (James 1:15). Thus, the end results as declared in the Book of Proverbs: “But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword” (Proverbs 5:4).

She may seem very religious

Some men feel that a strange woman is carnal, worldly, and has no interest in God or the Bible. Many wrongly assume that if a woman is pious in her conversation, she must be virtuous and pure in spirit. But such is not the case! 

A strange woman knows exactly how to bait a religious man—by religious words and pious effusive display! “I have peace offerings with me; this day have I payed my vows. Therefore came I forth to meet thee, diligently to seek thy face, and I have found thee” (Proverbs 7:14–15). Men, beware! There could be women in your church that could ruin your marriage if you allow an inappropriate relationship to develop under the guise of religious fellowship.

She may be attractive

“I have decked my bed with coverings of tapestry, with carved works, with fine linen of Egypt. I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon. Come, let us take our fill of love until the morning: let us solace ourselves with loves” (Proverbs 7:16–18). Her invitation was so alluring, that the disarmed victim went with her “as an ox goeth to the slaughter” (Proverbs 7:22). 

Men, do not allow a relationship at work or in ministry to draw you away from your wife to another woman, however attractive she might be! Remember the example of Joseph; rather than hearkening to the voice of Potiphar’s wife, he fled from her presence. Be wise, alert, and flee from her!

She promises pleasure without consequences

Beware of anyone who invites you to sin without consequences. The strange woman convinced the young man that nobody would ever know. “For the goodman is not at home, he is gone a long journey: He hath taken a bag of money with him, and will come home at the day appointed” (Proverbs 7:19–20). 

Many men today are allured by the same lie from the devil. Such ideas may be “a little look at pornography won’t hurt” or “a touch won’t mean anything.” Even thinking a little pat is just a friendly gesture is dangerous! Entertained temptations and foolish thoughts, when not brought “into captivity . . . to the obedience of Christ” (II Corinthians 10:5), inevitably lead to sin and to death. “Her house is the way to hell, going down to the chambers of death” (Proverbs 7:27).

Be wise and beware of the strange woman!